


hey, number neighbour!

by daffodilscent



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Muggle, Attempt at Humor, Banter, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Eventual Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Romance, F/M, Flirting, Fluff and Humor, Hermione Granger is a Good Friend, Humor, Light Angst, Luna Lovegood & Draco Malfoy Friendship, M/M, Mild Language, Modern AU, Pining, Ron Weasley is a Good Friend, Slow Burn, Texting, based off that twitter trend last year where u text ur number neighbour, no beta we die like men, no magic, the 4 houses still exist here
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-14
Updated: 2021-01-17
Packaged: 2021-03-12 01:16:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,657
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28752042
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daffodilscent/pseuds/daffodilscent
Summary: (01:27 am) hey, number neighbour!(08:32 am) I’m sorry but... number what?Or, in which Harry texts his number neighbour while looking for a laugh. He certainly does not expect to find a pretentious,although charming, guy on the other end.
Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter, Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 85





	1. (Possibly) Weird Wrinkly Old Man?

**Author's Note:**

> harry is in plain text.  
>  **draco is in bold.**
> 
> enjoy!

(01:27 am) hey, number neighbour!

**(08:32 am) I’m sorry but... number what?**

(10:23 am) wtf

(10:23 am) you wake up early

(10:23 am) fuck are you old

(10:24 am) shit i’m so sorry mister

(10:24 am) or miss

(10:24 am) i’m just sorry

(10:30 am) i’ll never bother you again

%%%%%

_**Group chat: Golden Trio.** _

**hjpotter:** FUCK

**roonilwazlib:** WHAT

**hermionegranger:** Are you alright, Harry? What happened?

**hjpotter:** i tried ur stupid number neighbour thing ron

**roonilwazlib:** IT’S NOT STUPID

**roonilwazlib:** i saw it online

**roonilwazlib:** it’s fun i tried it

**roonilwazlib:** got bloody smith from hufflepuff though

**hermionegranger:** Zacharias Smith? From Hufflepuff Tower?

**roonilwazlib:** yeah

**roonilwazlib:** real wanker that one

**roonilwazlib:** still, it was fun. even got mione to try it

**hjpotter:** what? really?

**hermionegranger:** Yes. Only to stop Ron from whining.

**hjpotter:** who was ur number neighbour?

**hermionegranger:** Some man called Viktor Krum. He didn’t really know English though. I just apologised and we never talked ever again.

**hjpotter:** well i tried it

**hjpotter:** think mine’s some weird wrinkly old man

**hjpotter:** fuck what if the guy’s a pervert

**hjpotter:** holy shit did i just give my number to a weird wrinkly old man pervert

**hjpotter:** if i die i want a big funeral ron

**roonilwazlib:** harry james potter, 19 years old, gone too soon. i’ll make sure everyone there is bawling for you, mate

**hjpotter:** ....i love you.

**roonilwazlib:** .....i love you too.

**hermionegranger:** Oh, come off it, you two.

**hermionegranger:** Harry, you are not going to die.

**hermionegranger:** How do you even know he’s an old man?

**hjpotter:** i texted them at 1am

**roonilwazlib:** ???

**hjpotter:** they replied at 8:30

**roonilwazlib:** yeah mate, definitely an old man.

**hermionegranger:** Excuse me?

**hermionegranger:** I wake up at 8am?

**roonilwazlib:** yeah but you’re hermione

**hjpotter:** yeah

**hermionegranger:** I hate the two of you.

**roonilwazlib:** <3 

**hjpotter:** <3 

%%%%%

**(11:07 am) I’m not an old man.**

**(11:07 am) Frankly, I’m quite hurt that you would assume that first.**

**(11:07 am) Is it because I woke up at 8am?**

**(11:08 am) Presumptuous much.**

**(11:08 am) Might I ask again though..**

**(11:09 am) Number what???**

%%%%%

_**Group chat: Golden Trio.** _

**hjpotter:** THE OLD MAN TEXTED BACK!!!!!!!!


	2. Soulmates?!?!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> decided to trash the am pm system and just went for 24 hours instead since it’s much easier.
> 
> as always,  
> harry is in plain text.  
>  **draco is in bold.**

**(11:17) Hello?**

(11:18) hi...

(11:18) mister...?

**(11:19) I told you I wasn’t an old man.**

(11:19) well u surely do act like one

**(11:20) I will have you know that I am a fully functioning young adult.**

(11:22) oh really?

(11:22) how old are you then

**(11:23) Why should I tell you that?**

(11:23) well if you don’t i’m just going to have to assume that ure an old man

(11:23) maybe you really are some weird wrinkly old pervert

(11:23) are you?

(11:24) hello? old man?

**(11:25) Ffs will you stop calling me an old man?**

(11:25) oh the old man knows internet slang

**(11:25) Has anyone ever told you that you’re bloody annoying?**

(11:25) i much prefer the term witty

(11:26) and determined

(11:26) knows what i want

(11:26) plus, has anyone ever told you that you sound a bit pretentious?

**(11:27) How would you know I sound pretentious if you’ve never heard my voice?**

(11:27) call it a gut feeling

(11:29) so... how old are you?

**(11:30) If I tell you, will that get you to leave me alone?**

(11:30) highly unlikely

(11:30) you can’t see but i just gasped btw

(11:30) leave you alone? right as i thought we were getting along

(11:31) i’m offended, old man

**(11:32) I’m not an old man! I’m 19 years old!**

(11:32) WHAT

(11:32) you do not sound 19

(11:33) hey good news though 

(11:33) i’m 19 too! :D

(11:33) guess we’re age buddies, old man

**(11:34) We just established the fact that we were born in the same year. Why are you still calling me old man?**

(11:35) why not?

(11:35) i guess it just stuck with me

(11:35) it could be my nickname for you

_***Harry changed ‘Unknown Number’ to ‘Old Man’*** _

**(11:37 l) Did you just name me as old man in your contacts?**

(11:37) maybe.....

(11:38) very fitting, don’t you think?

**(11:39) You never answered my question.**

(11:39) ???

(11:39) what question?

**(11:39) What’s a number neighbour?**

(11:40) ha!

(11:40) it’s some weird trend going around online

(11:40) do you not have the internet where you are?

**(11:41) Haha. Very funny. You’re a comedian, aren’t you?**

**(11:41) Of course I have the internet.**

**(11:41) I just don’t use it to look through stupid internet trends and participate in them.**

(11:42) rude much

(11:43) that entire text just supported my claim that you are indeed, a very pretentious man

(11:43) anyways

(11:43) my friend told me about it and i was bored so i did it

**(11:45) You were bored? At 1 in the morning?**

(11:48) ....

(11:49) yes.

%%%%%

_**Group chat: Golden Trio.** _

**roonilwazlib:** u ok mate?

 **hermionegranger:** What did he say, Harry?

 **roonilwazlib:** he’s not answering

 **roonilwazlib:** do you reckon he’s dead, mione?

 **hermionegranger:** He’s not dead, Ronald.

 **hermionegranger:** At least, I don’t think so.

 **hjpotter:** sorry guys! false alarm

 **hjpotter:** not an old man

 **hjpotter:** sorry i didn’t reply btw i was texting said old man

 **roonilwazlib:** i thought you said he wasn’t an old man?

 **hjpotter:** well yeah but

 **hjpotter:** i just call him that

 **hjpotter:** quite funny to see him get riled up

 **hjpotter:** inside joke i guess

 **hermionegranger:** Inside joke?

 **hjpotter:** yeah

 **hermionegranger:** Harry, are you sure it’s even safe to be talking to this man?

 **hjpotter:** of course! he’s our age

 **roonilwazlib:** the bloke’s 19?

 **hjpotter:** yeah

 **hjpotter:** pretty cool isn’t it

 **hermionegranger:** Well, as long as you know what you’re doing, Harry.

 **hermionegranger:** Now, if the two of you don’t hurry up, you’ll be late for Flitwick’s class.

 **hjpotter:** boring

 **roonilwazlib:** i second that

 **hermionegranger:** >:(

 **hjpotter:** coming!

%%%%%

_**Group chat: Blaise is a big wanker.** _

**dmalfoy:** What’s a number neighbour?

 **pansyparkinson:** didn’t know you follow internet trends draco

 **dmalfoy:** I don’t.

 **dmalfoy:** Just wondering.

 **blaisezabini:** Trying to impress someone, Malfoy?

 **dmalfoy:** Shut up, Zabini.

 **blaisezabini:** Boo

 **blaisezabini:** You’re no fun

 **pansyparkinson:** shut it blaise

 **pansyparkinson:** it’s an internet trend, draco. you text someone who has the same number as you with one digit off

 **dmalfoy:** Ah, alright then.

 **dmalfoy:** Thanks, Pans. You prove to be the only useful Slytherin in my life.

 **pansyparkinson:** xxx

 **theonott:** what about me?

 **blaisezabini:** Yeah, and me!

 **dmalfoy:** Sorry, Theo. Forgot about you.

 **dmalfoy:** Not you, Blaise.

 **blaisezabini:** You’re a right arsehole, Draco.

 **dmalfoy:** Says the big wanker.

 **blaisezabini:** Why is the group name still that anyway?

 **theonott:** that’s because you are a big wanker

 **blaisezabini:** Draco’s an even bigger one.

_***blaisezabini changed the group name to ‘Draco is a big wanker.’*** _

_***dmalfoy changed the group name to ‘Blaise is a big wanker.’*** _

**blaisezabini:** Prat.

 **dmalfoy:** Xxx

%%%%%

_**Group chat: Golden Trio.** _

**roonilwazlib:** harry

 **roonilwazlib:** harry

 **roonilwazlib:** harry

 **roonilwazlib:** harry

 **hjpotter:** what

 **roonilwazlib:** get us those weird looking sweets from honeydukes, will you?

 **hjpotter:** why can’t you go yourself

 **roonilwazlib:** mione and i are heading to the library

 **roonilwazlib:** she wants to prepare herself for advanced chemistry later

 **roonilwazlib:** we’re having it with the slytherins

 **hjpotter:** we are?

 **roonilwazlib:** yeah

 **roonilwazlib:** you know how competitive mione gets when there’s malfoy in the same class

 **hermionegranger:** I do not.

 **roonilwazlib:** excuses, excuses

 **roonilwazlib:** so? will you, harry?

 **hjpotter:** yeah yeah

 **hjpotter:** i’ll meet you guys in 10 

**roonilwazlib:** love you mate <3 

%%%%%

(13:24) honeydukes or zonko’s

**(13:24) What?**

(13:24) ah sorry

(13:24) they’re both sweet shops

(13:24) pick one for me

**(13:25) No.**

**(13:25) And I know what they are, idiot.**

(13:26) you do?????

(13:26) don’t tell me....

(13:26) are you a hogwarts student too????

(13:26) i just let out the most scandalised gasp ever

**(13:27) Don’t sound so surprised.**

(13:27) bloody hell

(13:27) first i find out we’re the same age

(13:27) then i find out we go to the same posh university

(13:27) not to mention we’re number neighbours

(13:27) are we...

(13:28) dare i say....

(13:28) soulmates?!?!?!

(13:28) although i do get it. posh university for a posh guy like you

(13:29) very fitting

**(13:32) We are not soulmates.**

**(13:33) Don’t ever say that again.**

(13:33) too late

(13:33) you’re already saved as soulmate in my phone :P

_***Harry changed ‘Old Man’ to ‘Soulmate’*** _

(13:34) hey what am i saved as in ur phone

**(13:34) Idiot.**

(13:35) ouch

(13:35) coming on a bit too strong, aren’t you?

(13:36) you should save me as soulmate too in your phone

**(13:38) Why would I do that?**

(13:39) why not?

(13:39) destiny brought us together

(13:39) fate, if you will.

**(13:44) I’m not changing your contact to soulmate.**

(13:45) :(

(13:45) ure no fun, soulmate

**(13:46) What happened to old man?**

(13:49) meh

(13:50) soulmate sounds better

(13:51) alright i’ve got to get to class before my friend chews my head off

(13:51) talk to you later, soulmate!

(13:51) remember to change my contact name!

**(13:52) Absolutely not.**

%%%%%

_**Private chat: Luna – Draco.** _

**dmalfoy:** Hey Luna

 **dmalfoy:** Just wondering

 **dmalfoy:** Do you believe in soulmates?

 **lunalovegood:** Of course!

 **lunalovegood:** Everyone has someone meant for them in this world.

 **lunalovegood:** Have you found your soulmate, Draco?

 **lunalovegood:** Do you want me to look at your aura later? 

**dmalfoy:** Um

 **dmalfoy:** That’s quite alright, Luna

 **dmalfoy:** Thank you.

%%%%%

_***Draco changed ‘Idiot’ to ‘Idiot, soulmate’*** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a bit of a filler chapter but at least draco’s warming up to harry :P  
> leave a kudos or a comment! ♥️

**Author's Note:**

> leave a kudos or a comment! ♥️


End file.
